People tend to assume that whatever they fear,
the other side intends to do.
Blaming someone for a conflict locks both parties into a position.
Being locked into a position leaves no room for legitimate discussion.
People locked into a position can only attack the other's position.
Under attack, people become defensive, cease to listen and strike back.
Seeing the reality as each side sees it opens the way to a solution.
A solution is only possible when merits and interests, rather than positions, are discussed.
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